Archive for August, 2006

Hot Summer Day on the Golf Course

Posted in Golf Jokes on August 31st, 2006

The summer day was a particularly hot one, but the Englishman who was on a golfing tour of the Continent gloried in the heat even though in Italy it had most of the locals gasping.

He was playing towards the fourth hole at Pisa’s Golf and Country Club when he came across a player who was completely naked and cooling herself in the water hazard.

Being a discreet soul, he cleared his throat to let her know he was there. She took no notice.

“Er, I say, hello,” he called hesitantly in case she hadn’t heard his previous approach.

“Er, I believe I’ve taken you unawares.”

“Well,” came a languid reply, “you junta’ putta’ ‘em back!”

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Golf Truths

Posted in Golf Jokes on August 31st, 2006
A golf gift given to you at Christmas by a non-golfer is always unsuitable.
A vacuum is the space between your ears that becomes entirely void of matter once you set foot on the course.
After 36 holes in broiling heat, there are never any clean towels for a shower. And the bar has just closed.
All forms of wildlife on a golf course are there for the express purpose of putting you off.

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